Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Brief Bullying Lesson - Part 2

So a little bit of time has gone by since I posted Part 1 of this lesson....like, seven months.  The spring semester flew by, and my testing duties at school kept me super busy.  I wasn't motivated to write a blog post in the evenings because I was so drained by the time I actually got to sit down.  It has taken me this long of summer to get back into "school mode" too, so hopefully I can do a better job at posting.

If you need a refresher on the entire two day lesson you can see Part 1 Here  Like I said seven months ago, I did this lesson with girls only.  We are lucky enough to have a gender specific rotation class.  I did a totally different thing with the boys, and it was a complete fail....maybe I'll post about that later. 

Anyway, I left off the day one post by giving the girls a self assessment.  Basically, they read through a bunch of statements and put a check mark next to the ones that apply to them from the last couple of weeks. 

Here is a link to the self assessment: Relational Aggression Self Assessment
I retyped it from information from Queen Bees and Wannabees and Girl Wars.

After the girls filled out the assessment I "graded" it.  This is what it looks like after I color coded the statements they checked:


Each statement they read through has something to do with either Aggression, Bystander, Victim, or Power behaviors.  This group of girls from this class were really sweet, like really.  I have had sheets that had almost every statement checked.  These girls were much more subdued than other groups I have dealt with.

When I go back to the class for day two (usually a few days later) I bring their color coded assessments and the following handout.  One day I might actually make this digital, but I also kind of like the handwriting too.  I give them the color code system so they can see for themselves how they rated.  We don't talk about any specifics, like who checked what, or who was really aggressive, or things like that.  I let them soak all that in for themselves, and they keep their results private...at least until I leave.

 I do go through most of the tips in the handout though.  I think there are some really good talking points.  In particular I like the timeline on the first page.  I use this a lot with students when they are going through a hard time.  We think about their life in terms of a timeline from birth to say 75 years.  We mark off the little chunk that represents where they are now.  I want to show them that things get better (I specify that sometimes things get worse before they get better, but they do get better!) and that they still have a lot of life to look forward to.

I also really hit on being careful about what they put in writing, especially text and facebook type things.  Screen shots have been the downfall of many a young lady involved in a fight with friends.

Sorry about the orientation of this picture - I couldn't figure out how to flip it! :)
To wrap up I talk about how important it is to tell ourselves positive things - that sort of inner monologue.  I give them each a blank index card and tell them to write at least one good thing about themselves on it.  This is hard for a lot of girls, it would be hard for me too honestly.  We tend to focus on the negative things about ourselves.  Then I tell them to keep the card and place it somewhere they can pull it out if they need to - book, locker, wallet, etc....someplace they can be reminded of how awesome they are, and how much worth they have. 

Well, that's it for now!  Thanks for reading.  I would love to hear how you address Relational Aggression in your school.  I'm always looking for resources!  Enjoy the rest of your summer!



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